The Final Orthodontic appointment pre op (and a stressful, sleep deprived couple of days…)

Firstly, apologies for not posting about the ortho appointment on Friday – it is now Sunday and it’s taken me a couple of days to get back to feeling normal. As the operation approaches, so my fear about it rises, which is OK, I was prepared for that, but unfortunately I hadn’t expected the additional stress that happened this week….. I have two cats, a male and female who are siblings, which I have since they were 9 weeks old. I adore them – they are “my babies”…. On Thursday evening (after my wobble with the blood tests at the pre op) the female began hissing at the male and generally looked like she wanted to attack. As well as scaring me, this really upset me, I don’t know why she did this. The male is the most dopey and docile cat ever and I felt really bad for him. I tried everything to sort it, but Thursday evening resulted in separating them into separate rooms and having the female in the bedroom with me. She is extremely cuddly and spent most of the night jumping on me, demanding cuddles… this also resulted in me not falling asleep until after 3.00am…. I woke up at 5.00am still feeling very worried and extremely sleep deprived. From 5.00am to 7.00am I tried to integrate them again, but she was still hissing at the male and generally having none of it….

I had to separate them again in order to get ready and go out to my final orthodontist appointment pre op. I was still very upset from Thursday’s pre op, massively sleep deprived and also worried if the cats would ever get on again… This was even before dealing with the surgical hooks going on and knowing that this was the last time I would see my Orthodontist pre op…

I filmed in the morning, but as you can see, I was very “on the edge” emotionally and was struggling to hold things together…

I didn’t film again until Saturday, as I spend most of Friday re introducing “the babies” and am so pleased to say they are now tolerating each other again and starting to get on with each other as they used to.

It’s now Sunday as I write this, but as I say, the cats took priority over most things the past couple of days…  I ended up being in tears most of my Ortho appointment… I felt massively overwhelmed with everything and it hurt to have the surgical hooks put on. I was also upset that my surgeon wasn’t in the room – I had questions for him and had expected him to be in there, so that upset me too. To be fair the way I was feeling I don’t think it would have taken much to make me cry, – I wasn’t wailing or making any noise, but I remember tears rolling down to my ears as I was lying in the dental chair. Everything that was going on, then realising that my surgeon wasn’t there, Being informed that a cut needed to be made in my lower jaw  to narrow everything (we had hoped we would get away without doing that cut), the pain of having the hooks put on and the fact that this was the final appointment pre op…. it was just all too much for me. I could have probably held it together if all of these things hadn’t happened at once. However, I am only human and I really couldn’t hold back the tears. I am feeling much better today and am glad that everything is in place and my babies are friends again. I didn’t mention the issue with the cats in either video as I was trying to just talk about the braces and surgery, however I decided to write about everything as it was all part of what was going on at the time.

11 days to go…… Below is a picture I took of my “mock operation model” this is where my bite will be after the operation x

my "mock" operation model - this is where my bite will be after surgery x

my “mock” operation model – this is where my bite will be after surgery x

 

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26th June 2014 – Pre Op…

Today was the pre op at Northwick Park Hospital. I wasn’t sure what to expect really but anticipated that I would be there for quite a while. My appointment was for 9.00am. I checked in and shortly after was asked to go with a male Doctor named Matthew. He was lovely and put me at ease right away. at first my weight was taken, then my height. He was happy with my weight, which (especially as a female) made me feel happy. We then went into a room and he said he was going to take 4 blood samples. I’m not the best with blood tests and for some reason I just don’t like things/pressure on the inside of my elbow (or the back of my knees) I’m not sure why this makes me so “jelly legged” but I just don’t like it and always look away. The first time he tried to take the blood he said the needle was in the vein (and it felt like it was) but then he said no blood was coming… I joked that I was in fact a vampire and asked why this would happen. he asked if I had eaten or drank anything this morning. I answered that I’d had nothing to eat but had drank a cup of tea about 30 minutes prior, which I’d got when we arrived at the hospital. He said he would try again….. the same thing happened….. I have never had this happen before. He then decided that he would try another vein…. this one hurt ….. once again no blood. He said that he would do the other things and then to go and drink some water as sometimes if you are dehydrated blood can be harder to get. He mentioned that he would ask his colleague to try to get the blood. I was asked some medical questions and then sent back to the waiting area. I drank 2 cups of water. ABout 5 minutes later I was called by a lady called Jacqueline. I went into the room and she tried to take the blood. 4th attempt….same arm….nothing. She seemed to push the needle in deeper and it really did turn my stomach. I felt very light-headed and queasy. She said she would try again. 5th time, the needle was in again… but nothing…. I felt cold and clammy and was starting to worry what was going on…. then a very little bit of blood started to flow…. thank God. She said that it was coming slowly so she tapped around the needle insertion….. I felt very light-headed and like I was going to pass out… I was trying so hard to control my body (if that makes sense?) and keep myself alert and stop the drifting feeling. I was cold, clammy and felt horrible. “I don’t feel right” I said, “I feel funny” my Husband who was with me said to lean back against the chair and try to calm down. My palms were sweaty and I felt clammy…. I managed to keep it together and we managed to take 4 viles of blood for the tests. This has got to be the worst I have ever been with blood tests, both for actually getting the blood, and for my reaction. After that was taken I was asked some more medical questions and sent back to the waiting are to wait for an ECG (to check my heart) In all honesty I didnt feel “right” for a fair while after the blood test and felt very queasy, but definitely not at the point I was while it was being taken (which I was so grateful about). Shortly after I was called for the ECG which was fine. I was given some info on anaesthetic and contact info for the hospital. by 10.30am I was all finished and ready to go home. As I still felt a little light-headed we stopped to get something to eat on the way home. I felt much better after eating something. This afternoon I felt a bit teary – I think being at the actual hospital that the operation will happen at really made things real and also the whole issue with the bloods (and perhaps an early morning wake up) just didn’t make a good combination. I met my mum at lunch time for a cup of tea and she said I looked quite pale…I think I just felt overwhelmed and perhaps a bit queasy still.  I had a doze at home in the afternoon and now at 9.15pm as I write this I feel back to normal. I have my Orthodontist appointment at Wexham tomorrow at 9.30am so I will try to have an early night. The hugeness of what I am about to do really hit me today at the hospital, I felt very unsettled and still quite scared for most of the afternoon.

Arriving at Northwick Park

Arriving at Northwick Park

Pre Op Department

Pre Op Department

After the blood test

After the blood test

After 5 attempts, we finally got there x

After 5 attempts, we finally got there x

 

On Reflection….

For some reason I was very excited that it was now under 3 weeks… As I’ve mentioned, I like to record things as they happen, when I’m feeling things… This video just shows where I’m at with the process and my expectations for  the appointment next week. I know that I have gone into a bit of a blog overdrive recently, I think that I have so much going on with the countdown perhaps that’s why? My apologies if this is repetitive in any way, my logic was that (if all goes to plan) I should only ever go through this once, so to capture as much of the journey as possible xxx

3 weeks to go…

The countdown is on! its 3 weeks to go until my Surgery. I think I just feel like “ok, come on, I’m ready” stop this waiting game, it’s giving me way too much thinking time and I can be my own worst enemy with this… Like when you go an a scary ride, and you know whats coming and you’re just sitting there, strapped in, holding on to the bar tightly and waiting…waiting for the ride to start…just a few seconds feels like ages…That’s sort of a description of how I feel with this right now.

I have the pre op next Thursday at Northwick Park Hospital, then back to Wexham on the Friday to try in the splints , also the dreaded surgical hooks will go on then too…I am really REALLY not looking forward to them… I’m prepared for them to cause more cutting to the inside of my mouth, more trapping of every possible bit of food I eat and also the fact that it’s even more metal in my mouth 😦 ***sigh***  these braces are more than enough metal for me as they are, however I do understand how important these hooks are and the huge importance they will have post op (wow, did I just write post op, in a sentence about me?! – this feel wierd!)

I’m glad I made the choice to finally embark  on this journey and get these jaws fixed once and for all, I am so indescribably grateful that I have been given the opportunity of help. I know the recovery is going to be tough but at the moment I’m rationalising these thoughts with the knowledge that (if all goes to plan) a month of hard recovery for a lifetime of aligned jaws, it’s a no brainer for me. I do understand that the full recovery will take months, but I’m hoping it’s only the first month that is difficult for me.lifes-roller-coaster-ride

 

Date with the dental hygienist devil…..

I thought I would be really good and efficient and have my teeth professionally cleaned just before the surgical hooks go on so they would be as clean as possible before my operation. I’m concerned about infection of any kind following the surgery and wanted to do all I could to prevent this. I usually get my teeth cleaned professionally every 4-6 months, its fair to say it’s not a pleasant experience but OK and has never been painful at all…. this was until I met the new hygienist at my dentist today……..As you can see from the first half of the video, I’m all jolly and looking forward to ticking another thing to do off my list, however the second half (and probably funnier one) was taken just after I got back to my car after the whole experience of today… as you can see my hair is frizzed as I was literally sweating in the dental chair… the pain from today was something i’ve never experienced, the hygienist was so heavy handed and I had to ask her to stop pulling my mouth wider twice as it was hurting my jaw, it felt like she had flippin’ rockets attached to the tools today, …i also had the suction tool shoved right down my throat a few time by mistake… i’ve never ever wanted to get out of a dental chair as much as i did this afternoon… looking back laughing now, but next time I have my teeth cleaned I will request that I please please do not have her. It felt like she was stabbing my gums with needles…

Ali’s Jaw Box…

I thought I’d share the contents of my box of bits and bobs that I have collected over the past few months with you. I have collected practical and completely random things that I thought would help make life a bit easier for the first month of recovery. (I still think the adult bibbles are amazing!!! lol xxx) Please feel free to comment if there’s anything else you would recommend, any suggestions are very welcome 🙂 … 3 weeks and 6 days to go….

1st real emotional wobble, 4 weeks and 1 day pre surgery…..

I don’t know if it was tiredness, hormones or most probably the fact that im going to have my jaws broken (sorry, I mean “controlled fracture”- yeah right, it’s a blinkin’ break not to mention one of the jaws being cut right off of my skull!!!!- little unsettled today, can you tell? lol x) I just felt quite overwhelmed by it all and quite uneasy. As this was the first time I’ve felt this to this degree I thought I would record my feelings, as well as helping others going through this, it is for me too, so I can look back on the process and what was going on in my head at different stages of the treatment… x I hope to look back and wonder what all the worry was about…. but trying to convince myself of this pre op is proving to be a challenge… “come on Ali, pull yourself together girl…”

13th June Update – feeling much better about everything today and back on form, I’m going to blame my wobble on tiredness and hormones… Hopefully I wont have any more wobbles until the week before surgery, if at all x